The Land of Grimney - The Illustrated Adventures of Cora Pearl, aged 12

Yes Meadow, apologise for being rude to a customer. Phlomena would be appalled. Both you and Smacca will get the sack if Madame Grober complains.

Madame Grober I do apologise.......for being six inches taller than you

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sizest!

Erm....I think you're supposed to be on my side. Now then Madame Grober let's all have a drink to celebrate the fact that SMacca is not going to say THAT word any more!

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shall we have a SILVER drink then ?

Your staff are as rude as they are stupid.

*Pellonia glares.*

I won't be paying my bill today, I expect your mistress will dock it from their wages.

*She nods curtly to the elf.*

Goodnight elf. I recommend someone gives your serving wench Meadow a good whipping. The only thing her low sort can understand.

Don't worry Pellonia - the customer is always right

I shall give Meadow a good whipping but I suspect she might enjoy it - I have seen her with tentacles around her already

Well done ladies... Do you ever have a satisfied customer? Right, I am locking up and gong to bed. You two clear the glasses and wipe the bar.

And don't think we will worry about getting our wages docked....we are used to it aren't we SMacca?

Yes maid

Touches forlock

Are we staying here SMacca? Vortigern the scarlet pimpernell might turn up tomorrow, you will like him, he's handsome and dangerous!

As for satisfied customers, yes we do actually.....Village Idiot is always satisfied

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Finally a man with a spine!!

great - let's stay here again tonight then

Do you think we need to take barmaid lessons again - we do seem to scare people away and I thought you said they were supposed to scare us??