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Tanza
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 Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:12 pm |
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Joined: Thu Jan 06, 2011 6:28 pm
Posts: 481
Location: Mostly on the floor
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DEATH BY FASHION
New showerproof jacket
Label telling lies that sell
Of warmth and shelter
Better than any other
Rain pours down and down
Never-ending wetness
Streams running down
Hair and face drenched
Soaked like a fat sponge
Wringing out heavy sleeves
Feeling the sodden hemline
Bashing against soggy legs
Absorbing entire clouds
Every spit, splat, drip, drop
Pockets fill like wells
Drowning keys and phone
Flapping, slapping fabric
Helping wind eat me up
Cold to the core again
Like yesterday and before
Sun takes over at last
Drying out top layers
Ignoring inner layers
Deceiving on-lookers
More effective in reverse
Keeping moisture locked in
Away from sun-dried outer
Propogating rain and sweat
Smelly and uncomfortable
Picking up dust and dirt
From sloppy mud kicked up
Colours change to drab
Craving cosy, cheap and bulky
Cursing such expensive failure
In rain, wind, sun and mud
Fearing certain death by fashion
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Gwenllian
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Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:17 pm |
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Joined: Mon May 16, 2011 11:14 pm
Posts: 2215
Location: south Wales
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I feel your pain, last "waterproof" I bought was more effective at making me sweat and keeping the moisture in than any rain out !
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PhilomenaAquitaine
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Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 9:51 pm |
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Joined: Sun Jun 05, 2011 1:54 pm
Posts: 7361
Location: Looking pretty behind the bar at Holme's Tavern
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Poor Tanza... Buy a brolly! I used to have this awesome gold umbrella we used to call the Bling Brolly. I lost it out clubbing about 5 years ago. Regrets.
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Tanza
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Posted: Mon Jun 25, 2012 10:00 pm |
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Joined: Thu Jan 06, 2011 6:28 pm
Posts: 481
Location: Mostly on the floor
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I've got the mother of all brollies. It's a massive dome and it covers my whole torso...and that's an incredible feat for any form of attire. However, when it rains, I can't see through it...so everyone has to watch out.
Love the description 'shower proof'. No...not shower proof. Spit proof maybe, but I'm well past my moshing phase now, so not much good to me.
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