The Land of Grimney - The Illustrated Adventures of Cora Pearl, aged 12

You know......I've had an idea I must admit you had me fooled there just for a brief moment. I can teach you how to act like humans and I'm sure nobody will ever suspect that you are animals. That way you can mingle with people and find out who your enemies are. Once I have trained you to act like humans I will take you to the Blue Dragon....that's a tavern where people meet. If nobody realises you are animals we can put the plan into action. What do you think?

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http://barbarafromplanetzorg.wordpress.com

That sounds like a plan to me, hey! you're not as thick as you look are you? So.....when can we gaaaaw to this tavern place?

Well it all depends how quickly you learn the art of being human and.....we'll have to wait for Word Wizard to get back so that he can put a protection spell on you, there's a lot of danger out in the mire.

It shouldn't take too long to teach you.....You are very bright for animals and a lot of people do act like pigs and cows and some humans are very chicken........many just follow like sheep.....No it shouldn't take long at all.

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http://barbarafromplanetzorg.wordpress.com

*woof, woof* Howdie all!
Funnily enough, I am disguised as a human already - I am a woof woof!
Someone has even nicked the rhythm of my song and it goes like this...
*Woof woof yelp*

I am a pooch like Wagger
I always have the best Tag huh
I am a pooch like Wagger
I am a poooooooch like Wagger

So I shoot for the
Scooper
If I find it
It's so super
Then I go for
A waaallk
My owners
Then taaalk
'Cos I have the grooooove like Wagger

*Woof woof howl*

I swear
I'll not chase
Those Poooooches
With a nice face
But I have the smooch
Like Wagger
With my pointed tracker
I have the smoooooooch like Wagger

Even though I know
I'm a stud
I always like to
Be with my bud
& Roll in
The mud
I'm covered in crud
Here comes the thud
And It goes like this

*chorus*
Take me by the lead
& I'll show you
Last night I performed
But it was so poo
Yes, it was total poo
It's sooo true
It was very much liiikkke total pooper

I feel so bad
As I flop my tail
We're about to sail
It's a dog's life
I don't like
His wife
Cos she
Always makes me
Feeeeel like I'm
A jaaaaaaiiillloor
And it goes like this

*chorus*
Take me by the lead
& I'll show you
I feel like I belong
In the cat Zoo
Yes, In the cat zoo
Oh no, the cat zoo!
I feel like I belong in the zoo, like Jaguar

*Woof woof scowl*
I am a pooch like Wagger
But I'm definitely not butch like swagger
I love those Racey pooches
I review those tooches
Yes I reviiieeeew all those toooooches

But I don't
understand
It's so awful
What have I done?
I'm so woeful
I'm not like that
Fenton
I never caused
Congestion
'Cos I got the moooooves like Wagger!


Let me know if you want a few tips on disguising as a human - I've been doing it for years! x

I thought that this was the DVLA - Driving Via the Lunatic Asylum! - is it not??!

*indignantly paws the trotter*

strange woman - I ask you ! - I'm a racey pooch & my name is Wagger

I live in a wood by a lake

where do you reside, Kristo?

OMG you are disturbing me in the middle of a mud fight - If you must know, you nosey piggy - I am a pit bull terrier!

Yes, Meadow is my only friend in here as pooches love meadows don't they?

I will carry on admiring the cottage from the outside whilst you are glamouring yourself

I'm doing all the hard stuff as usual
and as I said earlier it's a dog's life!

Are there any of your friends around here?

i.e. Rodney Trotter?