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 Post subject: Which Ending?
PostPosted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:25 am 
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Location: The Queen's Coven
Please could you help? Here is a poem created whilst in the grips of insomnia last evening. It has two titles depending on which ending. Which is preferable version 1 or 2? Or indeed neither?

Degenerative Verse 1

Catastrophic
Seismic shift
A kindly little parting gift

You will not do.
I’ve married you,
But you turned out to be
Nothing like the person
I imagined loving me.
It’s not for better or for worse
But till I’ve changed my mind,
I’ve put you back onto the shelf
Another love to find.
You’ll be a little jaded,
Or maybe devastated
But once a year or three has passed
You may be able to look at a man
Without wanting to rip his ******* off!

A kindly little parting gift 2

Catastrophic
Seismic shift
A kindly little parting gift

You will not do.
I’ve married you,
But you turned out to be
Nothing like the person
I imagined loving me.
It’s not for better or for worse
But till I’ve changed my mind,
I’ve put you back onto the shelf
Another love to find.
You’ll be a little jaded,
Or maybe devastated
But once a year or three has passed
The urge to kill will fade
And you will find that you can live
In the bed I’ve made.


I am getting bored of this topic which I think is a good sign. :lol:

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 Post subject: Re: Which Ending?
PostPosted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:41 am 
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Joined: Mon May 16, 2011 11:14 pm
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Location: south Wales
Version 2 works x for me !


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 Post subject: Re: Which Ending?
PostPosted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:50 am 
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Location: Hobsbane Waterfall
Gwennlian - South Wales? It was my privilege to visit The Gower and the Black Mountains not long ago. A lovely part of the world.

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Love all, forgive all, show mercy, condemn no-one.
May the King's peace be upon your body, mind, soul and spirit.
May love and joy be ever with you.

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 Post subject: Re: Which Ending?
PostPosted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 11:57 am 
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Joined: Mon May 16, 2011 11:14 pm
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Location: south Wales
Indeed it is I'm about an hour away from each of them !


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