The Land of Grimney - The Illustrated Adventures of Cora Pearl, aged 12

The Virtual Coffee Bar

A cup full of sins, I mean "beans m'lady?"
Muttering under my breath
This one has had many affairs
"Lovely" she replied noxious with wealth
What goes on behind closed doors
Nobody knows
But this one airs her filthy clothes
In Café Joes!
Thanks for the tip, Not!
"B'bye" Yes, Off you Tot!

A cheat, (oops)
"A treat today, man friend?"
There aren't enough men to go around
That's his excuse,
The one of Gend!
Are you God's gift?
Well, put away your bell end
And please give it a rest!
"Thanks for the tip"
But no thanks pest!

Crystal ball? "regular or tall?"
This one's a witch
Trying to fortune tell
Who is she trying to teach?
She should go back
Where no-one can reach
Let's hope she doesn't put a spell
As she hands out her claws
Too late,
I'm already Jel!

Here comes the WAG,
"Wet today!?"
"Yes" she said having a drag
Then comes the brag
"Guess where he took me last night?"
She exclaimed reading her mag
"To meet a football fan?"
"No, don't be stupid!"
"For a naked tan!"
"Oh, he's such a cupid!"

OMG! "A Cup of tea?"
This one is a hunk
"How did you enjoy Jubilee?"
Trying not to eye up his trunk
"Jolly good fun!"
"Here's your earl grey"
As I put in my tongue
Let me be your lady grey!
Another one on your rung!
Now, please show me the way!

Thanks very much Debra, I was hoping for more confessions though! - there must be an endless list overheard in a coffee shop afterall? x

I think I'll have a latte
but make it skinny please
oh and a chocolate muffin
and a bagel with cream cheese
are you sure that latte's skinny
I have to watch my waist,
the muffin and the bagel?
oh I'll have the meerest taste

hee hee - thanks x more please!

Medium cap with an extra shot, eat in
Police tape? Just in the pics
Choc on the cap? No here's a twist
Murder-suicide with PCSOs that's top brass
One poor sucker down scotland yard
Cause they want a word
Who's in charge? the cap, that's what I heard...

Thanks Fox!

I'll just have my regular, regular please
been a terrible start I lost my keys
I'm late for the morning briefing now
and the head of Admin is such a cow!
Oh could I have an extra shot
and a little more milk, so it's not too hot?
you know it'll be my neck on the line
if the monthly figures aren't in on time
do you think I could have another cup?
too damn right I'm sucking up!

blimey, you are up early or is it late night?! - good one G! enjoy your cuppa! x

Please can I have a Cappuccino
I want to watch a vid with Al Pacino
Oh, so you like to watch a thriller?
Then, perhaps I'll put your coffee in the chiller
To make it like a frappaccino
Then you can take it home
Which one will you loan?
The Godfather?
I haven't seen that one yet.
No, the woman of scent
It's raunchy, I bet
Great, so that's the one I'll rent