Ogres don't have this problem. We're born fat, wrinkly and fugly...and stay that way.
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| Body http://www.thelandofgrimney.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=526 |
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| Author: | Elvira [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 8:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | Body |
So then, Listen body, you and me, It's time we had a chat, I'm noticing some changes, And I don't like where we're at. Quite without my really noticing You've improvised a lot, Now I'm going to say this Loud and clear.... I want this all to stop! Just leave the skin, It's getting thin, And focus on the eyes, They're focusing quite poorly, Oh, Let's not forget the thighs. There is no need to emphasise My slightly saggy bum, It's a blessing it's behind me, Throw a desperate girl a crumb! Desist with all this aging It's a rotten thing to do, I'm asking for a break here, Just remember, this is you! |
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| Author: | Tanza [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 8:59 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Body |
I hear ya loud and clear!! Great poem...sadly, I can relate!! |
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| Author: | Elvira [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:14 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Body |
Thanks Tanza, I'm working hard on an anti-aging potion. I'm pretty sure that the base solution is vodka..... I'm now following you on twitter @lightdarkshade |
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| Author: | PhilomenaAquitaine [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:18 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Body |
No Elvira. The answer is to not drink, smoke, run 10 miles a day eat only wheatgerm and placenta smoothies, never have sex, and never ever smile... On second thoughts vodka seems like a plan! |
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| Author: | Tanza [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 9:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Body |
Every morning, I look in the mirror and I shout, ''Get out of my way old woman...I'm trying to do my hair!''. I swear one day, her hand will come out of the mirror and grab me by the throat and she'll say, ''Stop saying that to me every morning...it's really pissing me off!''. Then she'll say, ''Now, go and make a cup of boring tea, sit on your boring sofa and be a boring old munter and a terrible role model to your children!!''. If she wasn't me...why I'd.... Gosh...I really confused myself typing all that. I think I'll make a cuppa, do a bit of prank calling to people I don't like and have a lie down on the sofa with a spliff to recover. Oh my God...she's right!! |
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| Author: | HogstanceBilgecrack [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 11:16 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Body |
| Ogres don't have this problem. We're born fat, wrinkly and fugly...and stay that way. |
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| Author: | PhilomenaAquitaine [ Sat Oct 15, 2011 3:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Body |
Can I join you on the sofa, Tanza? I have got a box of after eight mints we can share although I do tend to get the giggles during prank calls. Oh Hoggy, you may be a fat, wrinkled ogre but it makes you very nice to cuddle! |
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